Zoe Chance, a behavioral scientist and professor at Yale School of Management, shares five key insights from her new book, Influence Is Your Superpower: The Science of Winning Hearts, Sparking Change, and Making Good Things Happen. Listen to the audio version-read by Chance herself-in the Next Big Idea App

Make it okay for someone to say No makes them want to say Yes

When you make an invitation without any pressure whatsoever, they become inclined to lean forward

  • Add a softener to your request like, “I know you’re probably busy” or “Please don’t say yes unless you really want to do this,” or “Would you feel comfortable?”

Being charismatic isn’t something you are-it’s something you do

You can become more charismatic-someone people want to pay attention to-with a few tweaks to your language, body language, and attention

  • The simplest charisma hack is to practice focusing your attention on people one at a time by asking questions and using people’s names more often

Authentic, lasting influence is a group project

As our paths cross, entwine, diverge, and reconnect, we form a greater whole-an interconnected web of influence

  • You are already part of this collective power
  • Your influence flows from other people and to other people, and from them to others, and so on.

Influence isn’t rocket science, it’s a science-which is great news because that means it can be mastered by nerds like us.

System 1 and System 2: Two internal systems governing all our thinking and behavior

  • Fast, unconscious, emotional, and instinctive
  • Slow, conscious, effortful, and seemingly rational
  • Because the unconscious mind is fast, it is the first responder. The conscious mind, being slow, is the second-guesser

The best predictor of behavior is ease

Ease makes people happy, and effort can really annoy people

  • 81% of customers who reported a difficult experience said they intended to complain to friends or post negative reviews, while only 1% said they would do the same if they had an easy experience

Source