I have a freakish memory for names, dates, and personal details about people. Always have. And it’s come in handy more than you might expect. But there’s a method to the madness-one that you can repeat to win people’s hearts.
Stop saying that you’re bad at names
Saying you can’t do something sets your mind up to not do it
- It tells the person you are meeting that they are not worth a little extra effort on your part to make their name stick
- Smacks of arrogance
- Letting you absolve yourself of responsibility for learning other people’s names lets you know that you do not care
Say their name slowly and intentionally one more time before parting ways
At the end of a conversation, people don’t often remember what was said, but they do remember how they felt while talking to you. Make them feel heard by saying their name again so they know you heard them.
If you do forget, own up to it and ask
Ask for the person’s name again and apologize
- This shows that you were paying attention to them and the conversation, but you just forgot a detail
- People will meet loads of other folks who don’t take the time to remember their name, but if you’re willing to be present and make the effort, you’ll stand out among the masses
Say their name back to them
Take the time to make this person feel important, heard, and excited to meet you
- Say it like you mean it
- Show that you’re interested in them as a person, not just a networking opportunity
- Ask for pronunciation help if they have a unique name
Make associations in your head
Do it quickly and discreetly.
- Don’t tell the person you are meeting what’s going on behind the scenes. Remember, they don’t care about how you remember their name. They care that you do remember theirs.
- Make the association as crazy as it takes to stick.
