Emotional agility, a vital skill in today's fast-paced world, is the focus of our exploration. We delve into its essence, its importance, and how it can be cultivated to navigate life's ups and downs with grace and resilience.
The prevailing wisdom says that difficult thoughts and feelings have no place at the office
This goes against basic biology
- Effective leaders don’t buy into or try to suppress their inner experiences
- They approach them in a mindful, values-driven, and productive way-developing what we call emotional agility
- Emotional agility can help people alleviate stress, reduce errors, become more innovative, and improve job performance
- Recognize your patterns
- Label your thoughts and emotions
- Accept them
- Act on your values
Label your thoughts and emotions
The opposite of control is acceptance-not acting on every thought or resigning yourself to negativity but responding to your ideas and emotions with an open attitude, paying attention to them and letting yourself experience them.
- Take 10 deep breaths and notice what’s happening in the moment.
Act on your values
When you unhook yourself from your difficult thoughts and emotions, you expand your choices. You can decide to act in a way that aligns with your values.
- Developing emotional agility is no quick fix-even those who, like Cynthia and Jeffrey, regularly practice the steps outlined here will often find themselves hooked. But over time, leaders who become increasingly adept at it are the ones who thrive.
Fish on a Line
These smart, successful leaders were hooked by their negative thoughts and emotions
- They were being controlled by their inner experience, attempting to control it, or switching between the two
- Cynthia was a senior corporate lawyer with two young children.
- Jeffrey, a rising-star executive at a leading consumer goods company, was often angry- at bosses who disregarded his views, subordinates who didn’t follow orders, or colleagues who didn’t pull their weight
Recognize your patterns
Notice when you’ve been hooked by your thoughts and feelings.
- Telltale signs: rigid thinking, repetitive thoughts, stories that seem old and recycled
- Leaders stumble when they pay too much attention to internal chatter and allow it to sap important cognitive resources that could be put to better use
