Do you feel like a loser right now? It’s okay – we’ve all been there. You can stop this feeling of failure in its tracks. The first step is to identify what’s triggering this feeling, as well as the steps you can take toward moving on from it.
Speak To Loved Ones
You are not alone and you do matter.
- By reaching out to those around you, you can try to work through whatever is going on that’s made you feel as though you have failed. When you invite someone in to understand how you feel, you’re no longer alone in the situation and things will start to feel less daunting and all-encompassing.
Try To Rationalize Your Thoughts
If we get ourselves into the habit of thinking irrational thoughts, these thoughts will become an automatic response and our minds will just jump straight to them in future.
- Try to rationalize our thoughts and re-program our minds, we can reroute them so that they jump to another thought.
Find The Trigger(s)
Do your best to find whatever it is that triggers these feelings.
- Record simple parts of each day and fill in what feelings crop up and when. By working out what is causing these feelings, you’ll be in a much better place to confront them and, hopefully, cope with or eliminate them.
Try Something New And Do Something Uncomfortable
Being in a new situation with people we don’t know almost forces us to act in a certain way.
- While you may be comfortable crying and having a strop in front of a close friend, you’ll quickly realize that you just have to suck it up and get on with it when you’re in a room full of strangers!
Remember The Good Days
Make a mental list of things that leave you feeling good to turn to during difficult times.
- Things can seem hopeless at times. Look back at your list and remind yourself that things have been good in the past and use that to power you through to them getting better again.
Reframe And Reword
The more you tell yourself that you’re useless/pathetic, the more this becomes your default, go-to thought
- By reframing and rewording your feelings, you can start to shift away from such damaging thoughts
- See mistakes as an opportunity to do better next time and overcome the issues you’ve accidentally created
Don’t Compare Yourself To Others
A lot of our feelings of self-doubt are in relation to other people
- We are designed to be competitive and size ourselves up against others, which can lead to feelings of unhappiness, jealousy, and inadequacy
- If you notice these feelings crop up more when you’re talking to certain people, distance yourself a little bit.
Ask Others If They Feel The Same Way
They Will
- Everyone has something that makes them feel bad about themselves.
- As soon as you realize that everyone around you has something going on in their lives and minds, you will feel less overwhelmed and more able to deal with them.
Seek Professional Help
The best thing you can do right now is nothing. The next best thing is to implement everything you’ve learned in this article by yourself.
- Talk to a therapist. They can help you grow your self-esteem and see your failures and successes in a more neutral light so you can process them in a healthy way.
Keep Track Of Accomplishments
When you’re feeling stuck and unfulfilled, you have a tendency to forget about all the great things you’ve done
- By keeping track of these things now, when you look back in a few months time, you’ll be able to see just what you’ve been part of
- These accomplishments don’t need to be work-related
- If you’ve traveled somewhere new recently or been on a date for the first time in years, make a note of it
Seek Guidance And Set Goals
Part of feeling like a failure is feeling very stuck where you are in life
- When you feel unable to progress in your life, you start to focus on the lack of experiences you’re having
- One way to tackle these feelings head-on is to ask for guidance
- Speak to your boss about setting objectives
- You can ask for figure-specific targets if you’re motivated by stats and numbers
- Ask your boss for objectives that reflect this side of you so that you feel motivated and invested
Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness is essentially focusing on being present; in the moment.
- By encouraging your mind to stay present, you can start to appreciate what’s going on around you and develop an understanding and enjoyment of where you are in your life now, which will help with feelings of dissatisfaction.
