Soccer star Abby Wambach on being good enough | ReThinking with Adam Grant
In an insightful conversation with soccer legend Abby Wambach, we delve into the challenges athletes face after retirement, the importance of personal growth, and the dynamics behind successful teams.
Abby shares her journey and wisdom, discussing the role of leadership, empathy, and resilience, and the evolving concept of ‘enough’.
I have a, a very big willpower and being able to transfer that into my retirement life has been important and, and I just think that building self-esteem is something that all of us can do. – Abby Wambach
Finding Happiness in Moments
Finding happiness is not about constant and sustained joy, but about appreciating happiness in moments.
This perspective encourages an understanding of the concept of ‘enough’ and the importance of defining what it means in different stages of life.
Learning from Personal Problems
Learning from personal problems is more important than relying on others to solve them.
This promotes independence and self-growth, ensuring that problems do not persist due to reliance on external solutions.
Setting a Direction and Defining Success
Setting a compelling direction is crucial in sports and life.
While winning is a clear goal in sports, defining success in life can be more complex.
Success is not about sustained happiness but about experiencing happiness in moments and understanding the concept of ‘enough’ in different life stages.
Unwavering Pursuit of Excellence
The success of teams, such as the Women’s National Team, can be attributed to an unwavering pursuit of excellence.
Despite differing individual paths, a common drive towards excellence is a bonding factor.
Reflection on the concept of ‘enough’ is also vital in this process.
Navigating Athlete Retirement
Retirement can be a significant life transition for athletes, often requiring them to redefine their identities.
Financial disparity can add unique concerns for women athletes in particular.
The transition can be eased by exploring new passions, serving others and not relying solely on previous accolades for self-esteem.
Empathy, Sympathy and Leadership
Empathy and sympathy are both important aspects of leadership.
It’s crucial to validate other people’s experiences, even if they differ from our own.
True leadership involves active listening, open conversations, embracing team diversity, and fostering a collaborative environment for problem-solving.
Personal Growth and Problem-Solving
Personal growth is often more valuable than relying on others to solve problems.
It’s essential to figure out solutions independently, as this prevents the persistence of issues and fosters self-reliance.
This understanding underscores the importance of personal and emotional growth.
“One of the things that prevents us from wanting to believe somebody else’s experience is that it’s a drama…It’s really vulnerable because there’s really nothing you can do…and so I think that sometimes it’s easier for some of us to just be like, ‘What the hell is wrong with you?'” – Abby Wambach
Embracing and Challenging Societal Expectations
Abby encourages men to explore and embrace their own femininity, challenging societal expectations of masculinity.
This highlights the importance of understanding and validating diverse experiences, breaking stereotypes and fostering an environment of acceptance.
The Evolving Concept of ‘Enough’
The concept of ‘enough’ is not static, it evolves over time as circumstances and priorities change.
It’s important to examine personal desires, motivations, and potential for greed in different life stages.
Social media can influence these feelings, so it’s crucial to be self-aware and keep them in check.
“What is enough for me right now is going to be different than enough for me in 5, 10, 15 years.” – Abby Wambach
The Role of Self-Esteem in Retirement
Building self-esteem without relying on external accolades or championships is crucial for retired athletes.
This helps cultivate a stable and grounded force within themselves, aiding in the transition to a new phase of life and contributing to a sense of personal fulfillment.
Optimism and Collaboration in Leadership
Key traits in leadership include optimism and a problem-solving mindset.
Emphasizing collaboration in problem-solving fosters positive change, highlighting the significant role leaders play in shaping team dynamics and success.
Resilience and Emotional Validation
Childhood experiences can shape resilience and the ability to remain grounded in chaotic situations.
However, it’s important to understand that remaining calm during others’ emotional distress can sometimes lead to feelings of invalidation.
It’s crucial to believe and understand others’ experiences, despite the vulnerability involved.
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