Other People Influence Your Happiness. Don’t Let Them Define It.
Discover the profound impact others can have on your happiness, while also learning to maintain your individuality. Explore the delicate balance between external influences and personal definition of joy, without surrendering your unique perspective on what truly brings you contentment.
Emotions of all kinds are highly contagious
Working in a negative environment can lower your happiness; living with a negative person can make you depressed
- Escaping unhappy people and their contagious emotions can be difficult, but you don’t have to live with someone for their bad mood to rub off on you
- Emotional contagion doesn’t even require direct in-person contact
- People transfer emotions virtually, often without even knowing who was on the receiving end of their negativity
Use the element of surprise
Get the unhappy person to engage in an activity that you know she likes
- Active, enjoyable activity improves mood more than suppressing the bad mood or envisioning good times
- Even if you ordinarily enjoy riding your bike, when you are sad or depressed, you might just say yes-and be more likely to enjoy it
Prevent the spread
Use strategies to understand your negative thinking and actively communicate with others to help keep your relationships healthy
- While you may not be able to will your feelings to improve, you can choose how you talk to and treat others, which will give your loved ones more energy to help you when you need it.
Work on your own happiness before trying to change others’
Forgoing your own joy for the sake of another person might seem like the more virtuous path, but it is a lose-lose strategy.
- Focus on what you enjoy and are grateful for first, then use that happiness to lift up someone else.
Don’t take it personally
Personalization of negativity and conflict is one of the most powerful ways that unhappiness spreads
- Take negativity personally and it can lead to rumination, which damages your mental and physical health and ruins your relationships
- Remind yourself each day that it’s not your fault, and you won’t take this personally
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