The five simple steps to ask for a favor and actually get what you want: Ask for help, get it, and ask for it. Every year on my birthday, I ask my readers to do me a simple favor. I tell them to leave a comment telling the world how I have helped them. People love the idea.

Consider how your favor impacts them

While this favor benefits you in some way, you’re putting this person out in another way. You need to acknowledge that and compensate for it.

  • Having empathy like this is absolutely necessary for two reasons:
  • It lets you talk to the person you are selling to on their terms. You can relate to them and speak their language, and it lets you adapt as the sale happens.

Hold on to your power

If you act like you don’t really need your favor granted, you are more likely to get what you want.

  • Lead into the conversation with something organic
  • “Hey, do you still want those tickets for the game on Thursday? Totally on me…”

Be very specific about what you want

When you ask for directions, don’t just ask “How do I get to the Farmhouse Restaurant?” – instead, ask for the directions to the restaurant.

  • The same goes for asking for favors – make sure you have a very specific ask in mind.

Ask with the expectation that your request will be granted

If you feel like you’re putting them out by asking for this favor, stop. You’ve already failed.

  • Go in with a winner’s mentality. If you’re going to play, play to win. Don’t hope.

Don’t lie

Being truthful makes people believe you and want to help you.

  • Studies show that when you come at people from a place of honesty, they tend to feel more secure with you because they know where you’re coming from
  • Don’t butter someone up and give them a bunch of phony reasons to do something

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